sorry

So it's 10 p.m. on Sunday night and it was a great day today. My energy is slowly building towards a more normal existence, which is a huge blessing. I didn't have to nap today at all, even though I dragged through the afternoon hours. I'm working with a chiropractor who uses a technique called "Neuro-Modulation," and it's amazing. Truly amazing. Definitely a holistic therapy, but if you're open to that and need help with a health issue, check it out.

Anyhow, the fam is good. We made it through Tate Family photos, which is always an undertaking (with the extended Tate family), and dinner at the Tate's. The cousins got a game of football going and had a ball. It was the first time I have seen ALL the cousins engage in an outdoor game like that and have so much fun. Perhaps this is the beginning of an era?

So here's the dilemma, or apology I owe actually: it just occurred to me that I think Tyson was supposed to give a talk in primary today. Oops. Wonder what happened instead...sorry nice primary ladies who are probably so tired of my kids not preparing for their assignments.

Still

I just wanted to share one of my favorite scriptures:

"Be still and know that I am God."

I'm not one of those people who memorizes references and stuff, and given the time I'm sure that I could come up with it, but I just figure that what's important is not the name of the chapter and verse, but what the Lord is saying.

What does it mean to me?
It means that life can be crazy. It can whirl me around like a tornado, take my breath away, confuse me with all the crazy stuff people say and do, fill me with love or pain or laughter or despair. It means that when I'm being thrashed to and fro, when it feels dark and hopeless, or when I feel betrayed or frenzied...that He is there and He knows. I am not alone, and if I can simply stay put in the moment, His comfort will come and guide me and rest upon me.

It also means that when life fills me with delight, when my heart is so full it might burst right out of my chest, when I feel like dancing, or laughing, or even just sitting and resting, that He is there, and I am not alone. He will dance with me and laugh with me for it is His joy that fills me up.

It means that when I doubt, He is there. When I question, He is there. When I feel deserted, He is there. When I feel alone, He is there. When I wonder where He is, He knows. When I curse Him for allowing me to feel pain and suffering, He stands by me and waits for the storm to pass. When the storm does finally pass, He is relieved also. But when I finally feel love and gratitude towards Him for my struggle, then He rejoices, for He knows that I have finally allowed my heart to grow, my soul to stretch and become closer to what He intends it to be, and that I am more like the person He sees as me.

So I will remember in quiet moments when the hustle and bustle of home are quieted to be still, for I KNOW that He is God.

What does it mean to you?

Trenches

We are ALL in the trenches and doing the best we can, aren't we? Sometimes I worry that my stress level is too apparent and comes across as unfriendliness or unkindness and that people think I am not nice when I'm really just cracking under pressure. So I try my best to wear my happy face while not being completely fake and hope that others are not getting offended by me. As for the job of raising this family, I pray every day for guidance and inspiration as I face the issues that arise, and that somehow, some way, at the end of the day everyone will know that they are LOVED and everyone will feel SAFE to be themselves and that whatever influence I have for good in this home will be exercised and felt! (And that also, somehow, by His Grace, perhaps my own needs will be met as well!)

I recently wrote this in a letter to a friend, and thought this thought is something I need to share in a bloggerly fashion!

So I hope your trench treats you well, today. And if there's no one else to tell you...then I will: you are doing a great job and your efforts are appreciated!

Sunday Best

So lucky to have built-in -playmates!

Life is better when you have a hand to hold.

"Bella sit down!" (Bella speaks in third person)

"Mom, can you fix my shoe?" says Hannah.

Eden is concentrating on something!

Time is flying by...Hannah's hair is getting long...my girls are growing up and summer is almost gone and I don't think I have posted new pics for a while, but today the weather was so beautiful that I couldn't resist taking the camera out when we got home from church to snap a few shots and freeze a moment in time.

Thank you to all of you who check in with me occasionally here. I appreciate it, I really do. Life is full of many wonderful things and yet also is very challenging for me right now and your supportive comments go a long way...trust me.

I adore these girls who are wearing me out!

Empty

So what do you do when the tank is empty?